30 Days of Blogging Honesty (+1 Dare) – Day 03

“Regardless of my current status, do I believe a person should save themself for marriage…”

I don’t like questions like these because I feel it gives people ammunition who don’t share my viewpoint to be judgemental or feel it is a good reason to attack me.  However, I will answer it all the same.

What I personally believe is that people should at least save themselves for someone they really genuinely love and trust.  All I can hope is that they wait until they are at an age where they are more mature, more grounded in their life, and it isn’t done because “everyone else is doing it”.  If you can wait until marriage, then by all means, good on you – I know I didn’t.  I didn’t even practice what I preached.

Does that mean I regret not saving myself?  Yes and no.  I wish it was with someone who I cared for more, but this confused time in my life has shaped me into who I am now.  If I had saved myself then I may be more confused, who knows.

I think ultimately, you should follow your heart, not what other people preach to you.  Don’t do something because everyone else is doing it, or because you think it’ll give you love.  If you wait until you’re with someone who you care about and love, it makes it all the more special.

"Abstinence" by Deltay on deviantart.com

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28 thoughts on “30 Days of Blogging Honesty (+1 Dare) – Day 03

    • Marriage is just a piece of paper to me, lots of people get married and don’t cherish eachother, so I don’t see how marriage really should matter anymore.

  1. Love it 😀

    I thought I did save myself for the one I love… and in that moment, it was indeed worth it. Unfortunately, life has a way of screwing you over and you cannot do anything about it since it falls under the “Shit Happens C’est La Vie” category…

    I guess that is why I believe in the saying “Live in the moment…” because right now, right here, you can be in the best relationship or connection with a person ever.. it would be quite sad if you miss the moment… however, we must also be aware that the future is always uncertain and that the best thing we can only do is learn and move on…and most of all, to not judge others on the choices that they have made 🙂

  2. When you wrote “I wish it was with someone who I cared for more, but this confused time in my life has shaped me into who I am now,” that line really resonated with me. That’s how I feel sometimes…I don’t regret it because it’s all a part of who I am and even who I’m with now. I gained all the more confidence I needed to go out and meet the right kinds of people for me. Loved your post ❤ Nobody is judging!

    • Haha true true. I’d rather sound like a PSA from Saved by the Bell though than sound too judgemental – I have no right to dictate what people do or don’t do, as long as they do it safely.

      ♫♪It’s all right ’cause I’m Saved by the Bell♪♫

  3. Don’t save yourself for marriage, that’s silly. Sex is just sex and love is just love. If you have them both then good for you, but fuck denying yourself of a basic human need. It’s just a little sex, not rocket science, there’s no need to be scared. Just wrap it up and do that shit safely! I think a better logic to live by is the one that says if you’re stupid enough to not be doing it safely then you shouldn’t be doing of at all – and that can happen at any age.

    Love always Brevin

    • Hahah oh Brevin – you know, on many levels you’re absolutely right 🙂 I think if people are wanting to have sex they should definitely be doing it safely. No need spreading their stupid germies and making babies if they arent ready 🙂

      Love ya!

  4. Cherlyn, I think a disclaimer should have been attached to the challenge stating judgements are not allowed. A person taking the challenge should feel free to express themselves without fear of retaliation of any sort. We will add that if we do it next year. The funny thing is, this is a question you gave me to include.

    You already know how I feel about what you wrote. Sharing with another through emails and knowing each other through our blogs for what will soon be three years is one of the benefits of us being good friends!

  5. i like how you answered yes and no if you regret anything. but i agree that it depends on the person really. whatever their hearts dictate then so be it and other people do not have the right to judge them actually.

    • Precisely – people define their own lives and as much as I wish people could or would do things certain ways, I have no right to dictate what they do. As long as they’re not like…committing a terrible crime, then I should not judge them.

  6. Pretty well said. I can understand about the sort of tricky nature of this question. Havign said that I am sure our views get modified according to the sort of experiences, we receive till it becomes our philosophy.
    But very heartfelt.. i like the last line 🙂

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