I would have liked to have written a new poem for this Thursday, but life it seems kept me busy for this past week. The first poem I have posted on Facebook before, and the second I havent shown anyone yet. I’m not very happy with it, and maybe sometime down the road I’ll fix it, but for now I’ll share it. Hopefully next week I’ll have more time to write.
Aversion To You
When you touch me
it’s as though I’m not there.
My mind wanders far away
and you are not aware.
I don’t feel much of anything,
But I try to get in the mood.
I am not interested, and I don’t care;
How and when did we become nude?
I am numb all over; I count
the seconds ’til you’re done.
I know you’re having a good time,
do I look like I’m having fun?
You finish up, you’re satisfied.
I see you out and lock the door.
I wash up, change my clothes
and ponder why I am so sore.
I wonder how I got this way;
how this aversion started – why??
I let the wrong ones in because
no one special’s caught my eye.
The smile painted on my face
hides the sorrow of my heart.
The loneliness of this place
Is ripping my soul apart.
Sustaining my meaningless life
my heart beats in this empty shell.
I am no love, no friend, no wife –
Alone eternally in this hell.
I used to be whole, and full, and alive.
Contentment whittled down to pain.
Now I merely just survive,
no more sunshine; just the rain.
Hoping to be heard or seen or wanted.
I asked for love, received neglect.
By my own faults I am haunted –
The person I am and always will be – you reject.