30 Days of Blogging Honesty (+1 Dare) – Day 04

“A blogger friend I’ve known for over five years told me she has been blogging anonymously all t his time and most of what I know about her is her fantasy.  My reaction to the news is…”

I imagine that the first thing I’d feel is shocked.  After that I’m sure a bit numb - I mean, that’s a lot of information to take in.

Knowing how I react to stuff, I’m sure after the numbing as worn off, I’d feel angry for a little bit.  Now, I’m a heated person, but what a lot of people may conceive to be my “anger” is mostly me just not dealing with being upset or worried – I get loud, and people attribute being loud to being angry.  Now, when I’m angry, I’m sharp – I talk fast, I get my points in and I’m not nice.  But when I’m angry it seems to subside fast.

I think at first if this scenario would happen I’d be for sure angry for a bit - and why wouldn’t I?  This person I developed a friendship with tells me she is not who she said she was.  I feel betrayed, I feel exposed because I’ve probably opened up to her.  I feel naked and used.  Within my anger the real deep emotion would be sadness because I would feel like she has taken away someone who I could depend on and love, someone close to my heart.  It’s like they killed her.

I know how I react to everything though, and I think I’d see an opportunity to still salvage the friendship – because ultimately this person has revealed to me a secret they’ve been holding onto because they trust me.  If I shove it back in their face, I’m just as bad as they are for lying.  I think I’d try to talk it out with my friend, to see the motivations behind the lying, to find out why it happened.  And ultimately I know I’d probably understand to some degree – when you blog, vlog, even facebook, you’re exposing yourself to strangers on the internet and sometimes you need to protect the people you love in your real life.

I think I’d take this news as something to grow from, to begin a better, more real friendship.  The friendship or the thoughts I may have had for this friend beforehand would be gone though – because that is the sacrifice we would both be making.  Forgive – but not forget.  If you forget you don’t learn from the past.

That’s when I’d say goodbye to whoever she was, and introduce myself to who she really is.

"The Long Goodbye" by TalQ on deviantart.com

Here is the most up to date listing of everyone participating:
Tom Baker, Aurathena, TheFerkel, Prysmatique, AnonymousBurn, Caroline, Koi, Sylvia Garza, Mariana, Everything L&L, Nenskei, MyNakedBokkie, Bluefiadiarries, VeehCirra, Princesa Musang, DLonelyStar, TemptingSweets99, LJ, Terriblethinker, Marliz3e, Sleep and Salami, Primadonna Zel, Sofia, Happyhippierose, Melanie and Sajeev.

***There are three bloggers taking part in the 30 Days of Blogging Honesty that consider their blogs NSFW (TemptingSweets99, Everything Love & Lust and Sofia). Visit at your own discretion. If erotic or sexual material are not offensive to you, please do visit and comment.

14 thoughts on “30 Days of Blogging Honesty (+1 Dare) – Day 04

  1. What, I missed a conversation about bra sizes!? Unfair! I love your last line – “That’s when I’d say goodbye to whoever she was, and introduce myself to who she really is.”

    That’s the best way of putting things….I just don’t know if I would be able to forgive and forget that easily. If they weren’t just replacing one fake persona with another. You know? There would always be that plaguing doubt. But excellent post! You put in a words a lot of what I wanted to say but couldn’t phrase properly.

    • I think I give a lot of second chances to people, so that may explain it. It really depends on the person too though. It’s a hard situation to gage.

  2. I did not approach the question as something serious… so I did not write about a scenario where I would feel hurt or betrayed… However, if it did happen in real life and I have had the notion that we are real friends and not just “Blogging” friends, I would probably feel hurt because I’d initially feel betrayed… But then again, I will probably still love her and admire her for it because it’s one way she could express herself..and in the end, she still chose to reveal it to me.. :D

    I’m all for honesty and I value it so much that I would think it a real insult and be FO (friendship Over) worthy if a friend of mine is dishonest… But I also believe each of us, individually, have the right to keep some things all to ourselves…

    Love your post! :)

  3. I have not visited many blogs this morning however the ones I have visited have been very understanding to the plight of that woman. I do agree with you that she must have had her reasons.

    Also have you noticed this year there seems to be more ‘genuine’ interaction between the people taking part in the bra size (30DBH). I think it is because of the little orange button WordPress added. It’s almost like a chat feature. I laughed at yours and Mariana’s yesterday. We should definitely do this every year.

  4. It is always nice to keep the other person in mind when things as crazy as this are reveled. Obviously there’s a reason they waited so long (5 WHOLE YEARS) to tell you. That is, unless they were just doing it to see how long they could keep up the charade, that’s just scummy. You have to admire their commitment though, 5 years is a LONG time.

    • I guess there’s also the factor that if you start your blog with the intention to protect your identity, privacy and the privacy of the ones you love, you probably never intended to be come too close with the people on your blog. Perhaps this person revealed their true selves because they realized they have created genuine friendships, and wanted to be honest because that’s what friendship is all about.

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